We will miss you Lolo Tony

                    Life, as they say, had always been simple until letters and numbers finally met and joined together in Algebra. True enough, because for me, everything became so complicated whenever I encounter a mathematical problem. There was a time that I was feeling so hopeless to answer my assignment in Algebra, I turned to my grandfather - and I found the light! He instantly gave me answers, such a heaven sent! But, I forgot to read the direction in my homework, it says there, “Show your solutions!” Oh gosh, lolo just gave me answers without even writing his computations or solutions to the math problem!

                     Well, that’s how clever my grandfather was. I could ask him about almost everything and he’ll surely give me correct answers. Be it in Math, Science, History, and English – anything! If there’s something we cannot answer, “Itanong kay lolo”. So one day, I asked him about “pandiwa and “pang-abay”. He smiled and said, “Paki-anhi ako bis la ano ayaw la it Filipino” (“Ask me about anything except Filipino”). And I told myself, Patay!

                      Oh! Don’t judge him, okay? Waray eh. During his school years in Leyte, they were not taught of Filipino subject. He understands Tagalog, but his knowledge in our language is limited. However, that doesn’t make him any less of a Filipino. My grandfather is a true and proud Pinoy! In fact, he used to be a guerilla; a defender of the Philippines. He was brave enough to fight and risk his life during the World War II for the love our country.

                      Yes, he was a smart, brave man. But for me he is simply my lolo - a loving grandfather. I could still recall how willingly he would let me baba (or carry) on his back when I want to kahit medyo tander na siya.J He was our advocate every time lola would lock the house if we are unable to get home by 6pm. He would tell lola to let us in coz we’re just kids having fun outside. Hahah, kunsintidor lang?! When I was a kid, I used to play and collect text cards (of my fave cartoon characters like, ghost fighter, fushigi yuugi, etc). I win big from bets almost each time I play and happily go home with lots of texts in hand. But nobody was happy for me. Everyone in the house thinks those are trash, except for lolo. I would brag the game and my cards to lolo, then he’d politely say, “Makarit ka gud” (“You’re really good”). My grandfather was the only one who understands my love and kababawan for texts.J Lolo is also a very appreciative person. Give him anything like, hopia, pambahay na shorts or a cheap cologne, he would say, “Uy! Wow!” It’s as if you’ve given him the grandest gift ever! But the best thing about him was, he would stay up waiting for each of us get home no matter how late it was. Kaloka! Hindi talaga siya natutulog kahit it’s already 2-3am pag umuwi kami from gimikan! Bongga noh? That’s our lolo. Hindi mapakali pag nasa labas pa kami. He really is a father to every one of us, a true head of the family.

                      Lolo Tony was known for different things. He was our Crossword Master, Math Wizard and Walking Encyclopedia. But my grandfather was best as a teacher coz he educated us with life’s greatest lessons. He taught us that life is short so we must learn to love, forgive our enemies and never dwell on our problems. He also taught us to be a good citizen of this country by paying bills on time and always follow the law. :p For lolo, life is simple - appreciate, laugh and find peace in every situation. And as a fighter, he told us to be firm with our decisions and be strong to face every challenge that comes our way. He proved that to us when he had to confront, probably, the biggest battle in his life.

                      June 2010, our lolo, 85, was diagnosed with Stage 4 Prostate Cancer.

                      “What?! Cancer?!” We were shocked and began to question, “Paano na?”, “Tatagal pa ba si lolo?”. Cancer eh, stage 4 pa. But lolo remained positive and followed all the procedures he had to go through. In fact, nagco-crossword pa rin siya everyday!J He went on surgery, cobalt, monthly blood transfusion, several follow-up tests and took a lot of medicines. We prayed every day and became devotees of St. Padre Pio (said to help the sick miraculously). After 4 months of confinement, his PSA (prostate cancer indicating test) showed normal results. He was finally discharged on Oct 2, 2010. Though he lost sensation on his legs and unable to walk, at least, he was somehow free from cancer and severe pain.

                      As an out-patient, he had regular check-up, PT and medication. We were able to celebrate important occasions together and he enjoyed life. He even gets to watch his favorite tv shows like Eat Bulaga & Captain Barbell. Thank God and to St. Padre Pio.

                      But on June 2011, Lolo started to complain of moderate to severe pain from his thorax up to his head and to different other parts of his body. Through a bone scan, we learned that the cancer recurred and this time, mas kalat na ang Cancer on his bones. Still an out-patient, he again had to undergo several tests and medications. Though in pain, he would still wait when one of us is not yet home. He could put up a joke even he’s hurting. He is still the same lolo tony, the OC and sometimes masungit na lolo. And amazingly, his memory was intact. On the 4^th of July, I asked lolo about America’s independence. He told us that US declared their Independence from Great Britain under King George III on July 4, 1776 led by George Washington and others. Discussion continued as he told us more stories about history. Kaloka no? At that moment dami pa ding alam and recalls almost everything!

                      Winner diba? That’s why we felt tatagal pa talaga siya. But on the 1st week of August 2011, he was coughing badly, temperature would go up, his BP was normally low, weak and laging tulog. So we had him confined again (part narin ng monthly medication niya). We learned that he acquired Pneumonia and had to undergo blood transfusion due to Anemia. Several follow-up tests were done and on the 3rd week of August, he was transferred to ICU due to low sodium level. Later that week, his doctors told us that lolo was already suffering from internal bleeding on his head probably due to the widespread metastatic activity which has reached his brain. The doctors spread out our options; either we submit lolo for surgery (bubuksan yung head) which has no assurance that he’ll get really better or just help him prevent from getting into a worse condition. At his age and situation, our family decided against the surgery at wag na siya pahirapan pa. Doctors and nurses monitored him closely and lolo went through a thorough intervention. The following week, lolo was having difficulty of breathing that made him subject to intubation.

                      Though in a palliative care, we were still hoping for the best for lolo but at the same time, we were trying to expect for the worst. We visit him at the hospital every day, although yung iba di nakabisita every day due to work and school. And while we know we won’t receive any response, we still talk to him and tell him stories. Heartfelt moment is when he tries to smile and mag-senyas na he is okay even if he’s in so much pain. There were times when we would just hold and raise his hand or arm a bit, he would immediately grimace in pain. Nakaka-awa coz ganun katinding pain na nafi-feel niya. As much as we wanted to free him from pain, we chose to give him the chance to fight for his own battle and supported him all the way. Like I’ve said, our grandfather is a fighter – a strong man.

                      September 16, 2011, my grandmother and I went to hospital earlier than the usual. Aside from lolo’s caregiver who was not yet around because she wasn’t feeling well, trip lang namin agahan coz my tito was there naman. Few minutes later, Charmaine, my cousin (who seldom visits lolo because of school) came in. After assessing lolo at around 4pm, we realized he defecated. We volunteered to clean him up but lola told us to just wait for Beng, the caregiver. His doctors entered to extract blood samples from him but though they were able to locate the vein, no blood extracted. At 5pm, Buboy (Charm’s brother, also my cousin) arrived from school. Lola told to us to have our merienda. While at the canteen, hindi talaga ko mapakali. I’m really having the urge to clean up lolo. Before 6pm, we went back to change lolo’s diaper. It was hard coz medyo kumalat na, that’s why we had to change not only his diaper but also his shirt, linen, almost everything. We groomed lolo properly and made him looked really neat – not knowing it would be the last.

                      Hours later, Beng came followed by my mom. My mom, cousins and I stayed outside the room talking about lolo. Earlier, the doctor reminded us that our grandfather’s condition is on supportive care; that there is no cure, hindi na tumatalab yung mga gamot and he is getting worse.  Lolo was already suffering from multiple organ failure. His lungs, kidneys and brain were not functioning appropriately; heart nalang niya yung okay pa. We told ourselves to be prepared in case the worst thing happens. After our small chat, at around 8:40pm, a little commotion happened inside the room. Lolo had an arrest. We all panicked, called the doctors and nurses then started to pray right away.

                      The doctor checked his ECG, ordered drugs to make lolo’s heart beat again; nurses monitored his vital signs and performed CPR. It was heart breaking to see lolo being revived. But what concerned us also was lola, who broke down since the moment she saw lolo arrested. While praying for lolo, we tried to stay strong to comfort lola. We informed kuya (our cousin) about lolo so he could come. I was used to see such scene when I was still in nursing school, and now, I can’t believe it was happening to me – to our family.

                      Ten minutes after his arrest, our grandfather was revived. Thank God, lolo was still alive! We gathered around him, assured him that we are not gonna give up and we’ll support him with his fight. At past 10 pm, we had to leave the ICU coz visiting hours are over. On our way home, as in we were still on the road, we received a call from Beng. Sobrang kinabahan ako. She asked us to go back because lolo had another arrest and was now being revived. Immediately, we went back.

                      We reached his room at around 10:40 and found out that he is already stable. Although his vital signs were okay, the doctor asked our family if they would still revive our grandfather in case another arrest would occur because they find lolo deteriorating. We let lola decide and her decision was for them to do everything they could to keep lolo alive until he, himself gives up.

                      Before 11pm, kuya arrived and we were now complete. We’ve been talking and praying for lolo. Since then, we stayed and never left him. Minutes before 12mn, for the 3rd time, lolo had another arrest. They had him revived and again, the doctor asked lola if her decision is still the same because based on her assessment, it was only the drugs and ventilator that is keeping our lolo alive. Lola said “Yes”, she is sticking with her decision.

                      We knew at that time that lolo is gonna leave us. He was already cold, his hands and feet were already black and ibang-iba na hitsura niya. He has suffered a lot.

                      Since then, we never left his side and each of us had a moment with him. When it was my turn, while holding my tears I whispered to him, “kun diri mo na kaya, sige na la, diri ko pabay-an it aton pamilya” (“kung di mo na kaya, sige na lang, di ko pababayaan pamilya natin”). Then lola moved closer and for the last time, she kissed him and said, “Love you, buh-bye.” 

                      It was so hard not to cry while seeing him dying. And no matter how much we want to keep him and stay breathing, we know we have to let him go. 

                      At 1:00 am, he had another arrest. For more than 15 minutes, doctors and nurses tried to revive him – they did everything they could. But lolo Tony finally gave up and finished his fight. At around 1:20am, the doctor announced him dead.

                      We always hear people say, 'Expect the Unexpected', that’s what we did when we learned about lolo’s worsening condition. Well, maybe we can expect or anticipate but can we really ever be prepared to face for the worst thing to happen? I don't think so; coz every ample amount of hope that everything is gonna be alright, kakapitan mo talaga.

                      September 17, 2011, at age 86, our lolo Tony gave up his earthly body. And now that he is gone, all the lessons he taught us and the memories we shared with him will live on and will never be forgotten. We will surely miss you lolo. Have fun Up there! May you rest in peace.

Padre Pio and My Grandfather

          October 2009, my grandparents went home from their tour to the US. They enjoyed every minute of their stay there, especially my grandfather. And since then, Lolo have been complaining mild to moderate pain from his shoulders to his lower back. He thought it was only the result of the electronic massage he tried in the US. But still, we insisted for him to consult medical help regarding his condition and later he was diagnosed with arthritis.

He had a regular monthly check-up at the Out-Patient Department of Veterans Medical Memorial Center since my grandfather is a World War II veteran. The pain he was feeling had become consistent and would take pain relievers almost every day. 

Last week of May 2010, Lolo already cannot sit and stand alone and would seek assistance to be able to walk. His appetite decreased and experienced “balisawsaw” or urinary retention. My grandfather slowly became very weak. 

We opted another consultation where blood samples were taken from him. Then on June 11, 2010, we received the results and according to the doctor, Lolo has to undergo immediate blood transfusion because of very low hemoglobin level. He was directly confined to the hospital and had to go through several tests. His attending physician requested for more blood works, abdominal ultrasound, chest x-ray, and bone scan. According to the bone scan result, there was already a widespread metastatic activity from his prostate to several parts of his body particularly on his bones including the skull. To confirm everything, lolo had to undergo biopsy. 

July 2011, at age 85, my grandfather was diagnosed with Stage 4 Prostate Cancer. ­­­­­­­­­­The whole family got shocked, confused, and feeling hopeless upon learning that he was now suffering from the big C. Tears filled everyone’s eyes but still tried to stay strong and be positive.

While waiting for the proper intervention to be carried out, Anna, a family friend came to visit my grandfather. She introduced and told us everything about St. Padre Pio. She also massaged lolo with holy oil from Padre Pio then we all prayed. Before leaving, she gave us a copy of the novena prayer for Padre Pio. Since then, we would attend mass at the Padre Pio Shrine in Eastwood City, Libis, Quezon City.

We prayed the novena every day, until the doctor told us that my grandfather had to undergo surgery. They said they had to perform Orchiectomy or the removal of the testes.

Following the successful operation in August, we were told that my grandfather has to subject for Cobalt/Radiation Therapy. For 21 working days from August to September, Lolo went on his Cobalt Therapy session. And during those days of treatment, we would also make him drink a drop of the holy oil from Padre Pio.

After my grandfather had completed all the intervention, amazingly, a cancer indicating test showed normal result, making him free from cancer. He felt relieved and stopped complaining from pain. 

On October 2, 2010, my grandfather was discharged from confinement. At age 85 with a stage 4 Cancer, he was considered as a Cancer survivor.

As an out-patient, he went on physical therapy and continuous medication. For several months after being discharged, he seemed to keep on getting better. We happily celebrated a number of special occasions including Christmas, New Year and his 86^th birthday. So with the miracle and all the blessings we had received, I promised to make a testimonial on how Padre Pio helped my grandfather survived everything. 

          But since it’s been almost a year now since my grandfather had survived cancer, this testimonial must have come late – very late.

          On June 2011, Lolo started to complain of moderate to severe pain from his thorax up to his head and to different other parts of his body. He went on a bone scan. The result showed that the cancer recurred and this time, it has a more massive widespread metastatic activity. From then, he again had to undergo several tests and medications.

          August 2011, due to low sodium he was confined at the Intensive Care Unit. His sodium was corrected for almost a week in the ICU then went back to a regular room. Although lolo had the inability to stay awake for a long time, he seemed to get even better. Until we discovered he had acquired an infection in the lungs – Pneumonia. Probably due to activity intolerance where he can only perform minimal movements and failing immune system, he had collected huge amount of phlegm that led him to Pneumonia. His sodium also failed to be on a constant normal level that caused him to a whole body edema. With such condition, he was again, transferred to the ICU.

          He was closely monitored and constantly checked up on. After several tests, the neuro-surgeon informed us that there is already an internal bleeding happening in my grandfather’s brain that caused him to sleep all day and incoherent. Though they do not guarantee a full recovery, we were asked if we wanted our lolo to undergo surgery to stop the bleeding. With my grandfather’s age and condition, we all agreed not to pursue the surgery. My grandmother doesn’t want to see her husband feel more pain and in such difficulty. As of the moment, even not on a state of comatose, my grandfather is now on mechanical support or ventilator. 

          This testimonial might have been delayed but I still pray that a miracle from God and Padre Pio would happen for my grandfather. To everyone who gets to read this, continue to have faith and believe in the power of a prayer and miracle.

July Movie Experience

Last July, I was able to catch two (2) of Hollywood’s major films; Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon and Captain America: The First Avenger. So this entry may come as late – very late.

July 1, I watched Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon where Shia LaBeouf stars once again, for the third time. With his Autobots friends, they shared another adventure in a war against the Decepticons and Sentinel Prime in order to protect the earth. Sentinel Prime’s character may have shown a little twist to the story but it was also a bit predictable. For a film with a shallow plot, I still didn’t notice that I was already sitting and watching it for more than two (2) hours. Thanks to the CGI effects or animation. The movie was indeed action-packed and breathtaking although most of the fight scenes seemed stretched just to prolong the movie. 

As a whole, I enjoyed the it, though most of the feedbacks I’ve heard or received were negative. I appreciate how they add humor to the story where Sam (Shia's character) was having a hard time getting a job and how everybody neglects him after saving the earth twice. The only thing that made me really disappointed about the movie was the lady lead; Rosy Huntington-Whiteley was terrible. She only emphasized her butt and kept on pouting her lips. Transformers is simply never the same without Megan Fox. 

On its second day of showing, July 28, I watched Captain America: The First Avenger. It starred Chris Evans for the lead role. It is the usual Superhero story where a weakling turns into a superhuman. 

Steve Rogers, a small, thin and puny guy from Brooklyn who only has good intention to serve his country by entering the army. Through the army doctor, he was able to be part of the elite soldiers that focuses in battling with the Nazi. He was also chosen to be given the special serum to become a superhuman. With the serum and Howard Stark’s inventions, the weak boy developed into a buff guy. Rogers became taller, showed huge muscles and appeared stronger. He then led a special group of soldiers. 

There’s actually nothing spectacular about the film aside from how Chris Evans played the weak and buff Steve Rogers. Again, thanks to the technology that made Chris shorter and skinny guy. In the film, they just depicted what Captain America is known for—his shield, which he sometimes used as a boomerang. And also, it was nice to see Tommy Lee Jones back in action. Well, compared to other superhero films, this movie was a little cheesy and has more drama. But what really made watch this was the trailer that was shown after the credits of Captain America. I eagerly waited for the credits to finish and catch the trailer of The Avengers which will be shown next year. And now, I am excited for it to come out.

MMDA vs. Billboards in the Metro

           The removal of billboards in Metro Manila had been a week long issue. Shortly after taking Bench's billboard featuring the Philippine Volcanoes along Edsa-Guadalupe down, MMDA ordered to roll down tarpaulins of Anne Curtis and Angel Locsin wearing bra and "offensive".

        This order from the MMDA last July 11, Monday, made people and fans of these celebrities to quickly react. The next day these two ladies released their sentiments via twitter. Angel first asked Anne regarding that matter, “Kelan tayo nagka-ad na naka-bra lang anita?:p" with a photo of the news attached to it. Later Anne replied, "No billboards in a bra. The most bikinis! Pero walang billboard now as they have claimed na pwede tanggalin ngayon. So i think MALI ang statement from the @MMDA.. The only billboard I have along Boni-Edsa is SMDC yata at naka GOWN ako dun!!! Saabeh!!"

Angel's follow up tweet was already aimed at MMDA, "if u think offensive our BB's na in a DECENT Bathing Suit & Gown po, fine☺ don't use our names na lang 2 promote whatever u r doing"

On the hand, MMDA already gave a statement that they would also include in pulling down billboards that have no permit. According to reports, Anne's SMDC and Angel's Century Tuna (with Phil Younghusband) billboards lack permit which was the reason why it was removed.

For me, MMDA should always be very careful in releasing an announcement of such order. Wearing of bra as a ground is way too different from lack of permit. I think they should also show consistency in implementing laws under their agency.

 I wonder if they would have done this if Bench Body's sexy billboards have not caught everyone's attention. And if they would get rid of billboards due to its content, what would be the function of Outdoor Advertising Association Of The Philippines (OAAP) now? Shouldn't they just leave it to them since there are more problems in the metro that they have to fix? Lastly, MMDA must STOP using celebrities and/or popular names to make "pabango" or "papogi" with their campaign and just do their job properly.

The First Entry

Lately I've been spending time reading blogs .. I enjoy checking out other people's view towards a movie, a certain place and with foods .. And so I decided to have my own .. Since I am only an aspiring blogger, I've had a hard time thinking what should be the concept of this blog .. I was confused whether to concentrate on movie reviews, to the places I go to or about foods .. But I realize my life, my mind has a lot to share about what happens to me living in the metro .. So i decided to just write anything that goes around the metro or in this city .. 

I know blogging isn't new, but right now I am still exploring this new-found-soon-to-be-hobby .. :)